The Waiting Game

38 weeks now!  As of Tues. (it's now Friday),  I'm dilated to a 3 and can't remember how effaced (my mind was in a cloud when the Dr. was talking to me).  I'm having Braxton Hick contractions quite a bit,. especially as I walk around.  I'm SO tired, most days.  At night I can't sleep.  I have crazy dreams, all about my water breaking, labor pains, and certain pregnancy phrases like, "losing your mucus plug," and "bloody show."  I wake up so much throughout the night; and much of the time I just sit on my bed and think, even though I'm so tired.  My mind won't shut off.  Pregnancy is a weird thing!  Most days I feel like someone drugged me with NyQuil and I'm a total zombie until sometime around 9 or 10 pm and then I get productive until about 1-3 am.  Every once in a while, I have days where my energy is up and by normal bedtime, I am ready and I sleep fine.  Some days I feel so positive about labor; caring for a newborn; and I'm not that stressed about someone else taking care of my kids while I am in the hospital.  Other days, I'm so tired and feel half dead and all of those things weigh heavy on my mind.  Oh hormones.  I have to remind myself that one day in the near future, I will feel normal again.   I wish I had kept a better record of past pregnancies to compare, but I think the last few weeks are total survival and I'm always extra tired, moody, and don't do much.   It's kind of a depressing time for me. I've noticed that this pregnancy has been the hardest to focus on the baby.  With 3 other kids to take care of (one who is constantly talking and needs my attention), I've had less time to dream and obsess about this new little babe.  I still do, but not as much as past pregnancies.  I feel like that has made the time go by faster, but has also left me feeling a bit unprepared.  Anyway, just wanted to record some of these thoughts.  Life is good.  I am blessed and I really just need some good sleep:).

And for the record, cravings and total turn offs with food eased up months ago, but a few random ones have come along.  (Boring to all who read this, but always interesting for mom to look back on)...

Ice...so good.  Sonic ice, the best thing ever, ever, ever!  (Yes, I am anemic)

Soda was something I hardly ever drank, like maybe I would try a sip every 3 years and realize I didn't care for it.  But all of the sudden, it's been hard to turn down, especially if it's with ice.  I still don't cave to that craving much though.

Green Smoothies.  Prior to pregnancy, I loved to start each day with a green smoothie.  It's been like that for the past 3 years.  But once I got pregnant with baby #4, I wanted nothing to do with them until my last trimester.  I'm so glad I want them again!

Lastly, coconut oil.  I've been using coconut oil for almost 4 years now and usually I would just throw it in a smoothie, other than using it as my skin moisturizer.  Cooper always has smoothies with me each day, and he has an allergic reaction to coconut oil, so I haven't been consuming any for a while now.  But for the past 3 weeks, I want to eat it by the jar, with a spoon!  It says on the jar that we can safely consume 1-4 tablespoons of it daily.  I stick to that serving size, but I always want more!  I eat it solid, not melted, and it's the best thing ever right now.  It's sadly, a highlight of my day, haha.  Can't wait to eat my spoonful of coconut oil every night.  I know, so weird, maybe gross to you, but I love it right now!  I've noticed that I'm less itchy since I've eating it too.  Right now, every member in my little family has a cough or cold symptoms, and so far I haven't felt sick.  I'm usually the first to get sick around here, so I'm thinking the coconut oil is benefiting.  Knock on wood, though.  We have to get better before baby gets here!